Letter From a Monster

Dear Human Child,

       I want to thank you sincerely for your wonderful hospitality. You have been most gracious to share your bedroom with me. I hope you don't mind, but I cleared out your stuff from my living space. You need to dust badly. Unfortunately, I became very hungry from shoving all those old sneakers and toys, so I ate them. I am very sorry. If it is any comfort, they were superb.
      I understand that you sleep at night. This may pose a problem as I work the night shift. I probably will make noises that will wake you up; I hope you will not mind. They are very odd noises, I must admit. My stomach for example makes atrocious growls. I get very hungry at night- so hungry, I could eat you!
       That was a joke.
       I hope we can be good friends.
From,
  The monster under your bed
PS Your neighbors are charming! Godzilla lives in the closet and has already invited me to lunch!